Mediocrities, Assemble! Super Zeroes is a special packed with the best moments of some of the corniest vintage superhero flicks ever made. Complete with host segments from Mike, Kevin and Bill!
For the first time ever, we’ve assembled five shorts about death, loneliness, and dismemberment into one big, old-fashioned yukfest. On their own, they would have been too depressing to put out into the world. But together, they form into a Voltron of hilarity, if Voltron was eventually going to die facedown in the snow, sad and alone.
He’s back! You probably didn’t know that he was gone, but he was and now he’s back! Swamp Thing, AKA Swampington Montgomery Thing, returns to thwart the sinister plans of the evil Doctor Arcane, who apparently is also back. But! Here for the first time is Heather Locklear, the young woman who is drawn to the mysterious charms of Mr. Thing and desires a love that is both human and plant-based. A sequel to the Wes Craven cult classic, The Return of Swamp Thing is decidedly NOT directed by Wes Craven, but that’s fine, because it means this one is bigger, more fun, and way more riffable. Plus, to kick things off, a puppet goes to the dentist in Danny's Dental Date, a short that's way scarier than anything you'd find in Dr. Arcane's lab.
It’s up to the young priest Father Kibbler to save the family and confront the evil lamp, face-to-bulb, before more people die. Okay, more people DO die, but can Father Kibbler finally put an end to it? And are tomatoes fruits or vegetables? A completely unrelated workplace safety short, It's Your Accident, remains oddly focused on this question! Join Bill, Mike and Kevin for the perfect Halloween treat—a night with Rifftrax Live and Amityville 4: The Evil Escapes!
At an abandoned old movie studio, security guards keep getting mysteriously murdered. The mystery: Why are there so many security guards for an abandoned old movie studio?! But forget that; the real secret is Hobgoblins! Cheap rubber puppets from outer space! Who vaguely resemble Gremlins! But not enough to bring on a lawsuit! Their power: they’ll make your wildest fantasies come true, and then you die, laughingly and embarrassingly. The studio’s new security guard, Kevin (no relation) quickly learns the secret of the Hobgoblins, and even more quickly lets them escape. Now it’s up to the inept Kevin and sexually-obsessed pals to thwart the Hobgoblins before they take over the world, or at least various neighborhoods in the Greater Los Angeles Area!
The Giant Spider Invasion, one of the most popular MST3K movies ever, is coming to a Theater near you along with the mighty men of RiffTrax! There’s a monster in Wisconsin, and it’s going to slowly, VERY slowly, strike TERROR INTO YOUR HEART! Sure, your grandma could outrun it, but TERROR is more fun! When a fiery meteor lands in the woods, strange things begin to happen in this small Wisconsin town — even weirder than usual, and that’s a pretty high bar! While the townspeople are picked off by spiders of varying sizes, two esteemed scientists ramble around the countryside in a late model sedan, where they find friendship, romance and a big mechanical spider built on a Volkswagen Beetle chassis!
It’s the year 2762. The galaxy is plagued with warring factions using hokey special effects to destroy each other. Out of this chaos a hero rises: the dashing, exquisitely bearded Captain Saber Raine (Casper Van Dien). Saber and his elite squad of commandos (other actors) embark on a dangerous quest to save the Prince and Princess of an unnamed planet from the clutches of the Evil Overlord Sinjin - an overlord so evil HIS VERY SKULL IS FILLED WITH CHERRY JELL-O. Can our heroes fend off Sinjin’s army of mutant androids and rescue the Prince and Princess? Probably! After all it’s Space Opera, but you never know! Join Mike, Kevin and Bill for an unforgettable Sword-And-Laser Swashbuckling-ly fun time, beamed to theaters nationwide!
Holiday fireplace videos. We all love them, they bring comfort and cheer to our living rooms and family gatherings. But have they ever made you laugh? We’re proud to present a new kind of fireplace video, one filled with festive comedy and music to be enjoyed by all! And yes, don’t worry, there is still a fireplace -- Kevin Murphy's actual Minnesota fireplace! The RiffTrax Yule Log burns brightly for over two hours. Enjoy the fire while along the way lots of fun RiffTraxy moments pop in -- such as bits of new Christmas riffs, original songs written and performed by the guys, classic carols, nose flutes, skits and excerpts from beloved RiffTrax hits of holidays past! There’s truly nothing like it, and no better way to keep your loved ones happy and smiling as the egg nog kicks in. Even the Ice Cream Bunny gives it his “HURR HURR HURR” seal of approval! Spend your holidays nice and cozy with Mike, Kevin, Bill, Bridget, and Mary Jo, it’s the RiffTrax Yule Log!
Michael J. Nelson is the former host and writer of the Emmy-nominated, Peabody Award-winning Mystery Science Theater 3000. Since that time, he has appeared on numerous radio and TV shows, penned a regular column for TV Guide, and authored best-selling books for both HarperCollins and Abrams. His first book, Mike Nelson's Movie Megacheese, thrilled critics, including Richard Schickel of Time Magazine, who said of Mike, "He's more fun than a barrel of Val Kilmers... Smarter than a roomful of Patrick Swayzes... and almost as hilarious as Keanu Reeves." Mike's laugh-out-loud follow-up, Mind Over Matters, prompted Kirkus Reviews to enthuse, "From someplace called Minnesota comes a Nelson funnier than Ozzie, Ricky, Lord or Half," and even dared to compare him to another legendary writer, saying of his Serious Speech to Business People, "[It] could easily precede [Robert] Benchley's immortal Treasurer's Report." And Kirkus Reviews loved his novel, Death Rat!, saying, "Fast-paced, outrageous and funny, first-novelist Nelson's mockery of media mendacity is as biting as La Dolce Vita or Network--only funnier!" Nelson speaks all over the country, is a frequent guest on radio and television, and along with fellow former MST3K writers/performers Bill Corbett and Kevin Murphy operate a podcast called RiffTrax, which, in a similar vein to MST3K, targets more mainstream films.